I had one of those moments yesterday where I found myself entering into battle with someone I barely know to make it clear that I thought their position on something was wrong, wrong, wrong. I couldn’t believe that they could be so narrow minded, so judgemental, so lacking compassion toward their fellow humans. And then it hit me: I was seeing my shadow self that goes everywhere I do. I too am narrow minded, judgemental and lacking compassion, and that’s OK because the perfect balance of the universe means that I am also open minded, accepting and so very compassionate. Holy wow, did that realisation shake me up!
This is how I reckon it works: our lightness can’t exist without shadows, just like day can’t exist without night. Everything we see in others is a perfect reflection of where we are at. It shows us where in our life we still need to dissolve our fears and beliefs that no longer serve us. It’s a beautiful tool and we should make more use of it.
I made a pact with myself a while ago that whenever I caught myself casting judgement at others, I’d shine the spotlight inward instead and work out what I was reacting so strongly to. We all have shadows. They are the parts of us that we disown and try to hide from the world but I’ve come to realise that in order to get closer to that true deep peace we all crave (well, I know I do), we need to embrace all parts of ourselves, including those that are hard to look at. And boy are they hard to look at.
I felt squeamish as I started dissecting my reaction to this person and I really struggled not to shy away from the icky feelings that came as I worked through it all. What came up for me during this exercise? Fear, mostly. Fear of being too opinionated, of not being open enough and of being a fraud. Once that fun little part of the process was over, I just sat with each of the feelings until I was cool with all of them. I had to eyeball my inner self and hang out in the shadows for a while until they stopped feeling so scary. And they did.
As you most likely already know, I’m a big advocate of using manifestation as a tool to create a life that hums along brilliantly and I also think it’s important to look at things in a positive light. We can’t hide behind glossy affirmations and false smiles though; we have to really feel the support of the higher spirit we speak to and of. Part of this is acknowledging the shade as well as the light, and giving a little nod of acceptance to the pockets of us that we sometimes try to hide.